Top 10 Things Every Military Spouse Must Master This Fall

JD Collins

Autumn is a time of change. The leaves turn colors; the air is now crisp. It is a perfect time for a refreshing change in one’s life. Learn something new, take a class, or better yet, learn from the experiences of others.

I found that the best source of advice often comes from those who had similar experiences. While browsing social media, I came across the question: “What must a new military spouse do to best cope with military life? Here are the top 10 things military spouses must master this Fall.

Get a Handle on Social Media
Social Media is great for connecting with other members of the military community, especially if you have just arrived at a new duty station. Introduce yourself and reach out to other military spouses. Always remember OPSEC and try not to get involved in unnecessary drama.

Take Care of You
It is very easy to get caught up in your spouse’s career. Step back sometimes and remember that you are his or her equal and your dreams and goals matter as well. The path to achieving them may be more difficult with the military lifestyle, but you should never forget about achieving your own personal aspirations.

Have Flexibility
Remaining flexible is key when constant changes in the military lifestyle occur. Situations like your spouse’s job, location, benefits, deployment schedules, etc.  can change within a matter of moments. As ironic as it sounds, if you accept that change is the only constant in your family’s life, you will be much more happier and willing to accept new things.

Be Patient
The military profession is one of the most stressful jobs for a person. Unfortunately, that stress can trickle down into family life.  There will be times when your spouse, other spouses or his/her command just simply won’t have an answer or a reason why things are happening or changing. Be patient and know that one way or another, things will work themselves out.

Say Your Affirmations
There will be times when you will accomplish or get through tough times that you would have never thought possible before. Remind yourself that you are stronger than you think you are. These affirmations will help build a strong foundation for your mental toughness.

Recognize your Resources
There are many different resources that are of little to no cost for military families. Be sure to do your research and find out what they are. From support groups, to the family readiness center, to the Commissary, get to know these areas so you can get to know the members of the military community.

Communication is Key
If you find yourself needing to vent sometimes, you’re not alone. Don’t keep things bottled up inside. Talk to your spouse, your family and friends about any concerns, worries, fears or doubts that you may have.

Look for the Positive
Military families are at the mercy of decisions and situations that may not always be preferable. Try and take a positive spin on anything negative. If you’re not in your favorite duty station, think of it as a new adventure. If you have to move away from family and friends, think of it as an opportunity to make a new social circle.

Be Resilient
After multiple deployments and separations, one has to develop the ability to withstand difficult conditions. Military life can be a lot to handle, but it is ability to recover quickly that makes you strong.

Find a Support system
As resilient as military spouses are, we sometimes need help or people to lean on. If you are far away from families and friends, look to build another support system at your new duty station. Reach out to other spouses in the area, the FRG leader or FRSA, coworkers, neighbors, people with similar interests…you get the idea!


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